Looney Tunes Double Feature review

Looney Tunes Double Feature Review                                                                                        5-14-21

To prepare myself for Space Jam 2: A New Legacy later this summer, I decided to review the two previous Looney Tunes movies: Space Jam and Looney Tunes: Back in Action.

Alien theme park Moron Mountain is going through rough times, and the boss Swackhammer (Danny DeVito) demands new attractions. Swackhammer’s flunkies are sent to Earth to kidnap the Looney Tunes gang so they will perform for the park against their will. Bugs Bunny (Billy West) tells the aliens that if they win a basketball game against the toons, they will be their slaves, so the flunkies harness the power of NBA superstars and turn into hulking Mon-Stars! Now, to win back their rights, the Looney Tunes gang have to contact Michael Jordan, along with female basketball player Lola Bunny (Kath Soucie, no relation to Bugs) if they want to win this game.

I know some people complained about this movie for having a ridiculous story, some dated CG effects, and some small plot holes, but please keep in mind that the original Looney Tunes cartoons were downright daffy, silly, and off-the-rails bonkers. Yes, I agree that the plot can be nonsensical a lot of the time, but there’s also top-notch voice acting, impressive character animation that almost rivals Disney, some good cinematography, and some memorable funny jokes. My favorite line in the movie is when Bugs and Daffy were retrieving Jordan’s lucky shoes, and they were discussing what to name their basketball team. Daffy suggests they call their team ‘the Ducks’, but Bugs disagrees and replies “What kind of Mickey Mouse organization would name their team ‘The Ducks’?”

My one major gripe with Space Jam is that Marvin the Martian, an alien who would serve as a foil for Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck, is used rather poorly, even though he could’ve easily defeated the Nerdlucks (Swackahmmer’s flunkies). Remember how he basically evaporated Daffy in the original Duck Dodgers?

I’m sorry to say this, Marvin fans, but in Space Jam, he’s reduced to a referee.

In conclusion, while not as bad as other people say it is, Space Jam could’ve been better, but you have to agree on one thing: It’s better than last year’s Scoob.

In another world where humans and toons (aka cartoon characters) live side by side, Daffy Duck (Joe Alasky) has been fired in favor of the more popular Bugs Bunny (also Joe Alasky). After getting Warner Bros security guard Damian Drake Jr. (Brendan Fraser) fired because of Daffy’s antics, he gets a message from his father, who’s also a secret spy, that he’s been kidnapped by the ACME corporation! Now Damian, Bugs, Daffy, and WB Vice President Kate Houghton (Jenna Elfman) have to go on a trip around the world to find the fabled ‘Blue Monkey’ Diamond before ACME does for their own diabolical schemes!

Many people, myself included, view Looney Tunes: Back in Action as an improvement over Space Jam with a witty script and animation/live-action interactions that are almost on par with Roger Rabbit.

While most of the toons that appeared in Space Jam were basically eye candy, many of the toons that appear in Back in Action actually push the plot forward, including Elmer Fudd, Yosemite Sam, Wile E Coyote, Marvin the Martian, and even the Tasmanian Devil!

Damian gambling with Yosemite with Foghorn Leghorn as the host.

Unfortunately, due to licensing issues, no non-Warner toons appear in Looney Tunes: Back in Action, so nobody from Disney, Don Bluth, Nickelodeon, DreamWorks (who had six animated movies by this point), or even Cartoon Network appears in the movie. The only non-Warner toons that do appear in the movie are Scooby-Doo and Shaggy Rogers.

If I were to complain about one thing, I'd say that both Damian and Kate are painfully bland one-dimensional characters. Not to mention that Joan Cussack is a little young to play Damian's mother.

In conclusion, while it has its issues, Looney Tunes: Back in Action is a movie that would make Looney Tunes legends Tex Avery, Bob Clampett, Friz Freleng, and maybe even Chuck Jones smile. I just hope Space Jam 2 lives up to its hype. It’s also important to note that this movie was the last time hand-drawn animation would be mixed with live-action until 2018 with Mary Poppins Returns.

Space Jam rating: 3.25 stars out of 5.

Back in Action rating: 3.40 stars out of 5.

Movie Review: The Mitchells vs the Machines

Movie Review: The Mitchells vs the Machines                                                                           5-3-21

Katie Mitchell (Abbi Jacobson) is a teenage girl who loves to make home movies. However, her father Rick (Danny McBride) starts thinking that she is becoming too reliant on cellphones and computers. When Katie gets accepted into the college of her dreams, Rick cancels her plane tickets and plans a cross-country road trip to spend quality time with her, along with his wife Linda (Maya Rudolph) and Katie’s younger brother Aaron. When machines start rebelling against humanity, however, the Mitchell family has to put their differences aside to save the world.

The Mitchells vs the Machines follows in the same footsteps as The LEGO Movie and Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse with stylized animation that rivals Disney, Pixar, and DreamWorks, engaging three-dimensional characters that families can relate to, and a story with a disturbing message on how over-reliance on technology may result in catastrophic consequences.

Another interesting aspect about ‘Mitchells’ is the usage of 2D animation throughout the film, even though movies like Moana and Captain Underpants did it before.

Most of the characters in the movie are also rather complex, albeit familiar: Rick is essentially a more likable Grug Crood (the Nicholas Cage father from The Croods), and PAL Labs, a company that took over the technology world a few years back, is similar to BnL from WALL-E.

Rick playing with an infant Katie.

Speaking of PAL, the original PAL cellphone, voiced by Olivia Colman, has both a tragic and simple backstory at the same time. PAL co-founder Mark Bowman simply threw her in the trash in favor of humanoid robots that can do things phones or computers can't, namely human labor. Now, she has a vengeance and wants to shoot every human into space and repopulate Earth with machines and electronics.

If I were to complain about one thing, I think that the title is too long. I personally wish they kept it as ‘Connected’, like how they did in the original trailer. Not to mention that most of Sony's animated films have long titles, like Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, Hotel Transylvania, and Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.

In conclusion, The Mitchells vs the Machines is another great animated film for 2021, though I do have a warning for the parents reading this review: Mitchells vs the Machines is about a robot Apocalypse, so the movie may not be appropriate for single-digit kids. However, Gravity Falls fans will love this movie, as directors Jeff Rowe and Mike Rianda also worked on that show.

Rating: 4 stars out of 5

PS. For all those thinking if I liked this more or less than Raya and the Last Dragon, you'll have to wait until June, when I rewatch Raya on Disney+.

Movie Review: Over the Hedge

Movie Review: Over the Hedge                                                                                                  4-7-21

Over the Hedge is about a lone raccoon named RJ (Bruce Willis), who accidentally spilt all the food for a brutish Bear named Vincent (Nick Nolte). Vincent tells him that if RJ recovers all the food within a week, he’ll let him live. RJ meets a group of misfit animals, including Verne the down-to-Earth turtle (Garry Shandling), a nutty squirrel named Hammy (Steve Carral), a sassy skunk named Stella (Wanda Sykes), and a thespian possum named Ozzy (William Shatner), and their forest has been destroyed to make room for a Cul-De-Sac. RJ uses his new friends to get more food to pay off his debt, but in the process, he discovers something that he never had: A family.

Over the Hedge is yet another forgotten gem with smooth animation, a colorful cast of characters, and a story with a message on how suburban sprawl impacts wild animals’ lives and how they have to adjust to survive in this new environment. As producer Bonnie Arnold puts it 'We (human beings) are the ones in the animals' backyard, and they are not in ours'.

As with other DreamWorks films, the film is full of jokes that people will either like or hate. I personally think it’s funny that RJ points out that people exercise just so they can eat more.

If I were to complain about one thing, I’d have to say that some of the human characters in the movie look kind of ugly. However, this is forgiving because DreamWorks wasn’t ready to make a CG movie starring humans yet, as they wanted to avoid the Uncanny Valley*.

Stella popping out of a cake.

In conclusion, during a year that saw many CG animated films, Over the Hedge is a fun film to watch around April. It’s also much much better than either Nut Job films, which the first one having a very similar premise to Over the Hedge.

Rating: 3.38 stars out of 5.

*Uncanny Valley is a term used in computer graphics: The more realistic you make a CG character, the creepier it gets. When DreamWorks switched to CG in 2003, they shy away from putting humans in their films other than sequels to Shrek. However, Conrad Vernon, director of Shrek 2 and Monsters vs Aliens, points out that if you make a human more cartoony, the creepiness subsides. With stylization from the likes of David James, Kathy Alteiri, and Christophe Lautrette, DreamWorks was able to give visually-appealing human-starring films like Monsters vs Aliens, The Croods, and the critically-acclaimed How To Train Your Dragon.

Movie Review: Raya and the Last Dragon

Movie Review: Raya and the Last Dragon                                                                       3-6-21

Long ago, in the fantasy world of Kumandra, humans and dragons lived together in harmony. But when an evil force threatened the land, the dragons sacrificed themselves to save humanity. Now, 500 years later, that same evil has returned and it's up to a lone warrior, Raya, to track down the legendary last dragon to restore the fractured land and its divided people.

So, what did I think of the movie? Well, I liked it better than Ralph Breaks the Internet and Frozen 2, but less than Zootopia and Moana. Raya and the Last Dragon has top-notch animation, lots of action-packed scenes, and well-developed characters, though not as engaging as Tangled or Moana.

Raya's pet armadillo/pillbug-like creature Tuk-Tuk getting distracted by a lizard.

The story is also a strong parable on how other countries dislike each other. When the dragons (except Sisu) sacrificed each other to save humanity from the cloud-like Druun, Kumandra was split into five kingdoms: Talon, Heart, Tail, Fang, and Spine. The Druun turn whoever they touch into stone, and it caused the people of Kumandra to become corrupted with mistrust and greed.

Raya trying to retrieve her stolen crystals from the infant Noi and the Ongis, a species of monkey.

Sisu, the blue horse-like dragon voiced by Awkwafina, can also be funny at times. She's a bit like a larger Mushu, though she can't breathe fire. Instead, Sisu is an experienced swimmer, and even has a canonical human form!

Sisu also believes that the world can be a better place if people were more trustworthy and selfless.

In conclusion, Raya and the Last Dragon is a great way to start the year off, though I have a warning for the parents reading this: 'Raya' is a bit more mature than previous Disney films, treading similar waters to Atlantis and Treasure Planet. There's lots of intense action and even some character deaths.

Rating: 3.7 stars out of 5.

Who Framed Fozzie Bear Chapter 14

After all that mayhem, Pops finally got Sam and Jenny over. When Rich pulled out Judge Coleman's (animatronic) head, which survived from the explosion, Pops was surprised.

"What the Sam hill happened here?" He asked. "I've been in showbusiness for 60 years, and I've never seen anything like this."

"What is Bob Iger doing here?" Asked Sam.

"He wanted to destroy Puppetown to make room for a Star Wars Land." Said Rich.

"I even have proof!" Said Janice, holding out her cellphone. "I recorded the whole thing on my phone while me and Fozzie were tied up."

"So, it was actually Bob Iger who killed Chuck Beasley?" Asked Sam.

"As well as Kirk Thatcher and my brother." Said Rich.

"But how did the bear's fur get on the rope attached to the safe?" Asked Sam.

"I used fur from Fooozie, not Fozzie, before that buffoon laughed himself to death." Said Iger.

"Mr. Iger," Said Sam, bringing Iger to his car. "As punishment for killing Beaseley and Thatcher, you will be working as an animator at both Walt Disney and Pixar Animation Studios in California for the next five years, even if they're both working on projects at the same time." As Sam drove off, Pops handed Coleman's head to Jenny.

"That's what I call one seriously disturbed puppet." She said. Soon, dozens of Muppets and puppets ran over to look at Beaseley's head.

"Can you make out what it is, Charlie?" Asked Kermit.

"I'll tell you one thing, Flipper Face." Said Charlie McCarthy. "He wasn't a frog."

"Or a ducky." Said Ernie, squeaking his Rubber Ducky.

"Or a dog." Said Rowlf.

"Or a Fraggle." Said Gobo Fraggle.

"Or a bunny!" Said Bean Bunny.

"Or a lion." Said Lionel.

"Or a sheep." Said Lamb Chop. As all the puppet characters were debating on what Judge Coleman's head really belonged to, Jenny noticed a stain on Rich's vest.

"What is that, Richie?" She asked.

"It's ink." Said Rich. "Chuck Beasely squirted me with some the other night. Why it's coming out now, I don't know."

"Here's your answer, Richard." Said Fozzie, holding a bottle. "Beasley Brand Disappearing Reappearing Ink! Chuck Beasley was a genius, just like his father!"

"Malarkey!" Said Oscar, popping out of a trash can. "If Chuck Beasely was such a genius, why didn't he leave his will where he could find it? Without it, we'd be lying on the street. And I don't mean Sesame Street." This made Richard think: Disappearing ink? When Janice opened the envelope, it was blank. When Fozzie wrote the love letter, he must've written on the will!

"Fozzie?" Said Rich. "Remember that love letter you wrote to Janice at Cyclia? I think you should read it to her now." Rich then handed Fozzie the love letter.

"Sure, Richie." Said Fozzie, as he started reading the letter. "'What's a three-letter word to describe the perfect wife? Y-O-U!'" Suddenly, more words appeared. "'I, Chuck Beasley, of sound, mind, and body,' It's the will! 'Do hereby bestow the property known as Puppetown to those lovable characters, the Muppets!" Everyone cheered when they heard the announcement.

"Hey, Richie!" Said Fozzie. "That was a pretty funny dance you did for the Moopets. Do you think your days of being a grouch are over?"

"I hope not!" Said Oscar.

"Only time will tell." Replied Rich.

"Yeah, well, give me a shake!" Said Fozzie, extending his paw, but when Rich shook, he got shocked, making everyone gasp. Rich wasn't really happy with that. "Don't tell me you lost your sense of humor already."

"Does this answer your question?" Asked Rich, giving Fozzie a tight hug. "Bear hug." Everyone cheered when they heard that, with the penguins throwing themselves in the air with excitement.

"C'mon, Fozzie." Said Janice. "Let's go home. It's late."

"I think I'll hibernate until Thanksgiving." Said Fozzie. With that, the Muppets and puppets all started singing.

Fozzie: We've had comedy

Janice: We've had mystery

Rich: We've had a real good time and solved a crime real easily

Everyone: Hey, a movie!

Oscar: I just can't believe they did it!

Everyone: Starring everybody

Rich: And me.

Jenny: There was spectacle

Pops: There was fantasy

Rizzo: Where they took a chance and saw romance end happily

Rich: In a movie!

Piggy: I just love happy endings!

Kermit: One for everybody

Charlie: Everybody

Scooter: Everybody

Bobo: Everybody

Fozzie: Everybody

Janice: Everybody

Everyone: Everybody in the world

Rich: And me.

Jenny: And me.

Fozzie: And me!

Janice: And me.

Pops: And me.

Rizzo: And me!

As everyone finished singing and started heading home, Statler and Waldorf started talking to each other.

"What did you think of the story?" Asked Statler.

"Well, it was better than The Happytime Murders!" Said Waldorf, and they both laughed.

THE END

Author's Notes: For those unfamiliar with Lamb Chop, she was sock puppet that was created two years after Kermit in 1957. She was created by Jewish ventriloquist Shari Lewis, and has been described as a 6-year-old girl who's very feisty and very smart.

Lamb Chop with her 'sister' Mallory.

While not as popular as Kermit, Lamb Chop was noticeable for working with Shari longer than Jim Henson would with Kermit. Check out the website below for information on Lamb Chop, Shari, and her daughter Mallory.

Mallory Lewis and Lamb Chop – Daughters of Shari Lewis

It would be a running gag in the Muppets that whenever penguins were happy, they'd throw themselves in the air. As Brian Henson put it, if you can't get the comedy out, you either eat something, blow something up, or throw penguins in the air.

Bean Bunny was a Muppet who made his debut in the 1986 Easter special 'The Tale of the Bunny Picnic'. According to 'The Muppets Character Encyclopedia', when the other Muppets were tired of being cute, they leant all the cuteness to Bean Bunny.

Bean's other appearances included The Jim Henson Hour, Muppet*Vision 3D, The Muppet Christmas Carol, some specials, and even Muppet Babies!

Gobo was the most adventures of the five main Fraggles on Fraggle Rock. He was adventurous, clever, and kind, though he would sometimes get his friends in trouble. He was a bit like Tommy from The Rugrats, except he was older and didn't have any known parents. Puppeteer Jerry Nelson (who performed Gobo) described him as a 'slighter older Robin the Frog'.

Who Framed Fozzie Bear Chapter 13

With all five Moopets defeated, Rich ran over to the Mega Shredder to turn it off, which was seven feet away from Fozzie and Janice. Right before Rich could turn off the machine, Tex Coleman knocked him off and got out a sword. Rich saw some swords lying around, so he grabbed one, only for it to wilt due to the effects of Muppet Labs All-Purpose Tenderizer. Rich threw the sword aside and grabbed a magnet, using it to try to grab Coleman's sword. Coleman, however, used his sword's magnetism to attract a drum to it, trapping Rich.

"Don't move." Said Coleman, getting out a Muppet Labs crushing machine. As the machine approached Rich, he tried to struggle free, but nothing happened. He then grabbed a Muppet Labs Exploding Hat and placed it on the magnet, making it explode. Rich got out of the way and got a bottle of Muppet Labs Super Adhesive. He lured Coleman to the crusher, sprayed some on Coleman's shoes, and rolled out before he could get crushed. Rich rushed over to the Mega Shredder and turned it off, which was four feet away from shredding the two Muppets.

"I wasn't worried." Said Fozzie. "Were you?" As everyone watched Judge Coleman get crushed, they were surprised to see a metal endoskeleton be exposed.

"Holy smokes, he's a puppet!" Said Rich, as the crusher slowly rose up.

"I prefer the term animatronic." Said 'Coleman', as he got up to get himself repaired.

"That makes sense, now." Said Rich, as Coleman was rebuilding himself. "Tex's last name is Richman, not Coleman, and he's in California. Also, Richman was an oil baron, not a theme park baron." When Coleman finished rebuilding himself, Rich identified the being: He had robotic movements and photorealistic eyes. It was the same animatronic who killed Paul! All that was missing was a Muppet-like voice.

"Remember me, Richard?" Coleman asked, starting to sound like Waldorf. "I am the one who killed your brother!" Rich started running, but as soon as he made it to the Mega Shredder, Coleman threw him to the floor and turned the Mega Shredder back on. When Rich got up, Coleman threw a punch at him that sent him flying ten feet backwards. With Rich on the floor, Coleman got out a chainsaw and threatened to kill him with it. Rich lunged out of the way and saw something helpful: A pig whistle. He blew into the whistle, and Miss Piggy, not Poogy, burst through the factory, and Coleman turned off his saw.

"Anyone called for moi?" She asked. "And who's that creep with the chainsaw?"

"I called you, Piggy." Said Rich. "And long story short, Judge Coleman is actually an animatronic, and he wants to destroy Puppetown and kill everyone who lives there to make room for a Star Wars theme park."

"That means you would've killed my frog!" Shouted Piggy, and ran over to Coleman and karate chopped him right into the Puppet Shredder. However, he didn't get shredded, and the machine got jammed.

"No!" Said an unknown voice. The Puppet Shredder turned itself off, inches away from Fozzie and Janice, and out came Disney CEO Bob Iger. "What did you do with my machine? No destruction company would want to destroy a place where their childhood companions lived! Now Star Wars Land will never be made!"

"So, you're the one who thought of the Star Wars Land concept." Said Rich.

"That's right." He said. "Nobody cares about the Muppets anymore, but Star Wars is still loved by millions! And I would've gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for you meddling kids."

"Save it for someone who cares." Said Piggy, tying Iger up with rope. "Go, Mr. Jewel! Save your friends!" First, Richard had to destroy the Mega Shredder. He grabbed a box of Exploding Clothes and poured them onto the Shredder. He jumped off the machine before it blew up, creating an explosion powerful enough to destroy the wall that bordered Puppetown. On the other side were Fraggles, singing, dancing, and playing games.

"How are we supposed to get down?" Asked Fozzie. Rich grabbed a remote control that controlled the hook. He lowered the hook down until Fozzie and Janice were on the ground. He untied them, and they were happy.

"Thanks, Richie!" Said Fozzie. "That was a close shave. I thought that our rubber chicken was cooked!"

"Fozzie!" Said Janice, hugging the bear. "You were a magnificent pillar of strength!"

Author's Notes: In the Paul Williams episode of The Muppet Show, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew introduces an All-Purpose Tenderizer. It could tenderize anything, including a ladle, a dish, and even the table.

In the Gilda Radner episode of The Muppet Show, Bunsen and Beaker test out a super adhesive that was so strong, it got stuck to everyone!

Coleman's crushing machine is inspired by Bunsen and Beaker testing pressure in the Muppets NOW episode 'The I.T. Factor'.

Bunsen crushing Beaker's Babe Ruth-signed baseball.

Who Framed Fozzie Bear Chapter 12

Meanwhile, Pops and Fozzie had arrived at the Gags Beasely factory entrance.

"Pops," Said Fozzie. "You go get help. I'm going to save Janice!"

"Just be careful, sonny!" Warned Pops, and he drove off to find Sam and Jenny. Fozzie tried going into the factory by door and through the windows, but they were both locked.

"Guess I have to use the chimney." He said. Fozzie climbed up the factory building, walked towards the chimney, tore off the cover, and tried fitting himself down the chimney. However, he was stuck.

"This will take a while." Said Fozzie.

----------------------------------------------------------

Back inside the factory, Coleman unveiled his ultimate weapon, which was covered under a cloak.

"Allow me to show you my latest invention." He said, pulling the curtain off to reveal what looked like a cross between a lawnmower, a bulldozer, and a wrecking ball. "This is the Mega Puppet Shredder! It slices! It smashes! It plows puppets! With this device, Puppetown will be destroyed in a matter of minutes."

"Won't anyone notice Puppetown's disappearance?" Asked Rich.

"Who would want to know what happened to some talking dolls when they could be riding a rollercoaster?" Asked Coleman. "I am planning on a new theme park based on the most popular sci-fi movie franchise of all time: I call it Star Wars Land. Imagine it. There will be a Dagobah waterpark, a Millennium Falcon rollercoaster, an updated Star Tours, a Cantina restaurant, and yards and yards of meet-and-greet characters, far as the eye can see! My god, it will be beautiful."

"That explains why you killed Beasley and Thatcher." Said Rich. "But why did you buy the taxi service?"

"You're the detective." Said Miss Poogy. "You figure it out!" Suddenly, Fozzie fell on top of Kermoot, and he was angry.

"Alright, everyone!" Said Fozzie, grabbing a sharpened banana. "Nobody move!"

"Put that banana down, you unfunny ursine!" Demanded Coleman.

"That's it, Coleman!" Shouted Fozzie. "Give me another excuse to shove a banana up your ear! We Muppets may act silly, but we're not stupid! We demand justice! The true meaning of the word probably hits you like a ton of bricks." Poogy just punched Fozzie.

"Save it for the Judge, bear rug!"

"Tie the lovebirds together and hang them on that hook." Said Coleman, and the Moopets tied up Fozzie and Janice and hung them on a hook 10 feet apart from the Mega Shredder.

"Oh, Fozzie." Said Janice. "You were magnificent."

"Was I really?" Asked Fozzie.

"Better than Mortimer." She replied. As the Moopets got the Mega Shredder ready, Coleman walked over to Rich.

"It's over, Mr. Jewel." He told him, and as he walked away, he slipped on a banana peel, making the Moopets laugh hysterically again. "Stop that laughing! One of these days, you'll laugh yourselves to death!" This gave Rich an idea.

"What should I do with Richard, boss?" Asked Miss Poogy, pointing her slingshot at him.

"Let him watch his friends get shredded, then ice him." Ordered Coleman.

"With pleasure." Said Poogy, as the Moopets started giggling maniacally.

"Everything's funny to you, bacon breath?" Rich asked Poogy.

"You have a problem with that, Richard?" She asked.

"No." Said Rich, walking over to an old Vendawish machine. "I just want to tell you about the bear you're gonna shred." He deposited a quarter into the machine, and it started talking.

"Hello." Said Vendawish in a robotic voice. "I am Vendawish. You have deposited a coin, and I will answer any wish you may have."

"Play a silly song for me, please." Said Rich.

"Request granted." Said the machine, and it started playing 'Merry-Go-Round Broke Down'.

"Now, Fozzie is his name." Rich sang. "And laughter is his game. Come on, you dope. Untie your rope, or else, I'm gonna maim." Rich started dancing, and the Moopets started laughing again.

"He's lost his marbles." Said Janice.

"I don't think so." Said Fozzie, as Rich grabbed three bowling balls and started singing again.

"This singing ain't my line." He continued. "It's tough to make a rhyme. If I get stuck, I'm out of luck, I'm..."

"We're running out of time!" Said Janice.

"Thanks." Said Rich, as he threw the balls into the air and failed to catch them each time. This made the Moopets laugh their heads off. Rich then used a pogo stick to bounce into the air and get electrocuted by the ceiling lamp. The Moopets laughed so hard that Roowlf and Foozie literally died laughing.

"Dogs go in and out." Rich continued. "Whales have got to spout. Without that gun, I'll have some fun, and punch you in the..." Vendawish threw a pie at him.

"Stomach!" Said Fozzie.

"Stomach?" Said Poogy. "That doesn't rhyme with spout!"

"No," Said Rich. "But this does." He punched Poogy in the snout, sending her flying as she hit the Mega Shredder and got sliced into fuzzy ham. Poogy's demise made Kermoot and Janooce die laughing.

Author's Notes: I am, in no way, insulting Star Wars fans in this story. I just think that Disney cares more about that property than the Muppets.

Mortimer Snerd is another Edgar Bergan creation. While Charlie McCarthy is a smart Alec, Mortimer is as dumb as a brick, almost like Goofy.

Fozzie Bear with Mortimer on The Muppet Show.

The sharpened bananas in this chapter are a reference to the Crystal Gale episode of The Muppet Show, in which Bunsen and Beaker invent a banana sharpener.

On rare occasions on The Muppet Show, there would be a vending machine Muppet named Vendaface (Vendawish in the Leslie Uggams episode). He would give Muppets face-lifts, but the outcome isn't always what they expect.