“Hello?” Asked the
secretary.
“Hi, there.” Tommy
started. “This is Tommy again. Now that you funded our show, we’d like to ask
for a favor: Since television is slowly dying, could we put our show on
YouTube, as well?”
“Why, certainly!” Said
the secretary. “Besides, with every thousand views, we’ll get 5 bucks!”
“Wow!” Said Tommy.
“I’ll tell my friends right away!” After putting down his cellphone, Chuck and
Leon entered Tommy’s office. They were carrying a large sack
“We have the
characters you wanted!” Said Chuck, dumping the sack’s contents, while Leon
locked the door. Out came Bessie Higgenbottom from The Mighty B, Bunsen from Bunsen is a Beast, Sanjay and Craig from Sanjay and Craig, and, surprisingly,
Fanboy and Chum-Chum.
“How did you get
Fanboy and Chum-Chum?” Asked Tommy.
“We have our ways.”
Said Leon. “We didn’t get the ducks because they received more hate than
necessary.”
“Not to mention they
look like us.” Said Chuck.
“Alright.” Said Tommy.
“Though I have to tell Tucker and Dil to change the upcoming social media
posts.”
——————————
It was June 10th,
2019. The Pickles Theater premiered the Nicktoons Talent Show, and an
astonishing 20,000 people attended. After weeks of rehearsing, it was time to
play the music. It was time to light the lights. The Nicktoons characters were
finally ready to perform their talent show. Gerald Johansson from Hey Arnold
was chosen to host the program.
“Welcome one and all
to the Retro Nicktoons Talent Show!” He began. “I am your host, Gerald,
Arnold’s best friend on Hey Arnold with Marge Simpson-like hair. This evening,
you will get to see your childhood come to life with fresh new acts! First up,
the once mutant duo CatDog will perform a song called, Cat Diggity Dog! I hope
you enjoy it!” The curtain went up, but Cat and Dog weren’t there. They were in
a wing, putting on their vaudeville clothes.
“Now, Dog.” Said Cat.
“We’ve been practicing for over a month now, but I just want to remind you:
When I say Cat Diggity Dog, you say Cat Diggity Dog.”
“Okay!” Said Dog, and
they walked onto the stage while the band played ragtime music.
Dog: Cat Diggity Dog!
Cat: Cat Diggity Dog.
Dog: Dog Diggity Cat!
Cat: Dog Diggity Cat.
Dog (jumping on Cat’s
head): He’d want to do this!
Cat: I’d want to do
this!
Dog: I’d gotta do
that!
Cat: Terrific.
Both: How could it
get, how could it get, how could it get any better than this?
Cat (throwing Dog
off): I could think of a hundred ways!
Dog: Two and one
brothers!
Cat: You mean two and two
brothers!
Dog: We never fight.
Cat: We never fight.
Dog: Except when we
yell and scream! (Runs off to grab a dunk tank, and comes back a second later)
When we scratch and
bite. (Jumps into the tank and makes a big splash, drenching Cat in water)
Cat: How could it get,
how could it get, how could it get any wetter than this?
Dog: Could I get you a
towel?
Heffer: Here’s a
towel! (Drops it on Dog, who then gives it to Cat)
Dog: We’re salt and
pepper!
Cat: We’re salt and
pepper.
Dog: We’re bacon and
eggs!
Cat: Bacon and eggs.
Dog: My legs were his
arms!
Cat: His legs were my
arms!
Dog: My arms were his
legs! (Runs off with the tank and replaces it with a trash can)
I’ve gotta eat trash!
Cat: He has to eat
trash.
Dog: He’s gotta eat
well!
Cat: And man, am I
swell!
Dog (digging through
the can): I eat til I’m full!
Cat (holding his
nose): And boy, does he smell! Pew!
Dog (kicks the can
aside): Hi-ho Diggity!
When day is done...
Cat: It’s almost done,
folks!
Dog: And our two heads
Are better than one!
Both: It just doesn't get, it just doesn't get, it just doesn't get any better than this!
When the duo finished
singing, the crowd cheered with delight. Tommy was looking from the backstage
right, and he was happy with the results.
“I knew people still
cared about us.” He said, as Cat and Dog walked off the stage. Jimmy Neutron
then told Tommy some news.
“Tommy, I have bad
news.” He said. “Dog jumping into the tank delayed the next act. However, while
it’s refilling, I could demonstrate some of my inventions! And I even brought
someone to test my inventions on. Carl!” Carl Wheezer, Jimmy’s allergic and
gluttonous best friend, then walked over with a plate of pasta.
“Hey, Jimmy!” Said
Carl. “You should try this spaghetti that Phil made! It’s gluten-free!”
“I think I’ll pass.”
Said Jimmy. “Anyway, I need your assistance with my inventions. Do you suppose
you could help me? I promise that it won’t result in any catastrophes!”
“Okay, Jimmy.” Said
Carl, and the two of them walked on stage while the tank was being refilled by
Jenny/XJ-9.
“Good evening,
everyone!” Jimmy greeted. “Our next act, the dunk tank, has been delayed, so up
next, I’m going to showcase five of my inventions on Jimmy’s World of Science!”
Jimmy then got out a green and blue cube, opened it, and poured its contents
out. These were all Jimmy’s inventions throughout his show’s run. He held up a
small package and started talking.
“This is Book Gum.” He
said, pulling a piece out, which looked like a tiny book. “Pop this in your
mouth, and you’ll be able to memorize an entire novel for two hours!”
“Can I try one,
Jimmy?” Asked Carl, grabbing a piece. “Tastes peachy. Oh no! Mom, dad! Run away
from that rhino!!!” Jimmy slapped Carl’s back, making him spit out the gum.
“Next is the
Girl-Eating Plant!” Said Jimmy, showing a plant reminiscent of a Venus flytrap.
“This carnivorous plant will only eat female insects. Let me demonstrate.” He
grabbed a box of crickets, scooped some out, and showed them to the plant. The
plant swatted away the male crickets and gobbled up the females.
“Unfortunately,” Jimmy
continued. “The Girl-Eating Plant is incapable of producing seeds. And for
those conservationists out there, I trained this plant not to eat bees or
butterflies!” Jimmy then placed the plant in the green and blue cube and moved
on to his next invention. “Next is the Cheese Ray. Want to reduce world hunger?
Well, aim the Cheese Ray at an object, and it will turn whatever it hits into
cheese! Just make sure you’re not lactose intolerant.” Jimmy aimed the cheese
ray at a leather chair, pressed a button, and it turned into cheese.
“Oh, boy!” Said Carl,
running toward the cheese chair, ripping off a piece, and shoving it in his
mouth.
“Carl!” Said Jimmy.
“Put that back! I’m gonna turn the chair back to normal!” Carl pulled the cheese out of his mouth and placed it on the cheese chair. Jimmy pressed the
button on the cheese ray again, and the chair turned back into leather.
“Next up,” Jimmy
continued. “Is the Hypno-beam!” He held up a yellow and green device with a red
swirl. “With this device, you can make people and animals obey your every whim!
May I have a volunteer from the audience?” Heffer then ran on stage, happy to
volunteer.
“I want to be
hypnotized!” Said the steer. “I don’t care how embarrassing it would be!”
“Come on, Jimmy.” Said
Carl. “It will be funny.”
“I don’t see why not.”
Said Jimmy, aiming the Hypno-beam at Heffer. “You will go on a crash diet until
you weigh 200 pounds!” Heffer then had red swirls in his eyes, and he started
to speak.
“I will go on a crash
diet until I weigh 200 pounds.” Heffer said in a monotone voice. “I will now
take a jog around the block. See you in an hour!” Heffer then ran out of the
Pickles theater to jog around the block.
“Shouldn’t we
un-hypnotize him, Jimmy?” Asked Carl.
“I could always turn
the Hypno-beam off...” Replied Jimmy. “In another hour!” He and Carl then gave
out a laugh.
“There goes my
go-for.” Said Tommy in the backstage right.
“I still have one more
invention, folks!” Said Jimmy, holding the green and blue cube. “Want to know
how I got all my inventions here in the first place? The Hyper Cube! This
device can store up to 10,000 objects, including human beings!” Jimmy opened up
the Hyper Cube and placed each invention back inside one by one, and they
vanished into thin air, when in reality, they were inside the cube. Jimmy blew
a whistle, and his robot dog Goddard appeared. A robotic arm popped out of his
back, grabbed Carl, and shoved him inside the cube.
“Jimmy?” Carl asked
from inside the cube. “Will this plant eat me?”
“Of course not, Carl!”
Answered Jimmy. “They wouldn’t call it a girl-eating plant if it preyed
on males!”
“Okay, then.” Said
Carl. “But what is this cube made of?”
“Aluminum alloy.”
Answered Jimmy.
“Aluminum?” Asked
Carl. “I’m allergic to aluminum! Achoo!” Goddard pulled out the robotic arm and
pulled Carl out of the box, but Carl was covered in mucus.
“XJ-4!” Called Jimmy,
and a lavender four-armed robot appeared and sprayed soap and water on Carl,
and dried him up with a sponge mop. XJ-4 then left the stage, and the audience
laughed and cheered for the boy genius and his allergy-prone friend.
Author's Notes: The song Cat and Dog sing in this chapter was an actual song sung on CatDog, andhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnCYfcF19fI
All five inventions talked about in this chapter were all real inventions featured on Jimmy Neutron (both the TV show and the movie).
Carl saying that the gum tastes peachy and telling his parents to run away from a rhino is a reference to Roald Dahl's James and the Giant Peach.
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