Thursday, July 6, 2023

Chip n Dale 2: Wrath of Pickles Chapter 2

Later that day, Chip was at his job at Coercive Insurance. Monterey Jack, who still had an addiction to cheese, lived at Chip’s house with his dog Millie. Chip was trying to sell insurance to a 13-year-old boy with dirty blond hair, light brown pants, and a magenta shirt with gray stripes.

“Life is the worst.” Chip began. “Which is why you need good insurance, especially for someone who’s basically a living lightning rod. Would you like to buy some insurance?”

“Sure!” Said the boy. “I’d like to buy some insurance.”

“Great!” Said Chip, taking out a form. “Sign here please.” He wrote his name, Milo Murphy, grabbed the form, and walked off, only for the indoor sprinklers to go off.

“Great sale, Chip!” Said Bruno. “Me and Marshall are going to hang out at his pad in the swamp. We’re gonna watch Pirates of the Great Lakes. Wanna join us?”

“Sorry, Bruno.” Said Chip. “I promised Dale I’d hang out with him tonight. Thanks for the offer, though!” He then turned over to see a brown Muppet dog near a computer. “Hey, Rowlf! What are you gonna do this weekend?”

“I’m gonna go camping with Kermit and the gang.” Answered Rowlf.

“Okay.” Said Chip. “Let’s see who’s next to visit Coercive today.” Suddenly, Chip’s phone started ringing.

“Chip, is that you?” It was Dale on the other line.

“Dale?” Chip answered. “I thought you worked with Krusty the Clown now.”

“I do.” Said Dale. “But this is important. Ugly Sonic has been kidnapped! The police have surrounded FanCon! They need your input!”

“Okay, I’ll be right there.” Replied Chip, hanging up. “Marshall, could you take my place while I’m gone? Tell them that I got kidney stones during lunch break!”

“Got it!” Said the frog. “Just promise to come back on Monday!”

—----------------------------------

Chip soon arrived at FanCon, where humans and Toons alike were looking at the scene of the crime: A pile of blue quills where Ugly Sonic got kidnapped. Chief Bogo from Zootopia, who took the place of Captain Putty after the Sweet Pete incident, started asking questions.

“Are you the one they call Chip?” He asked. “The one who defeated Sweet Pete last year and freed bootlegged Toons?”

“Yes.” Replied Chip. “But where’s Dale?” Dale soon ran through the crowd to see Chip.

“Here I am!” He said. “We’re Chip and Dale, the Rescue Rangers! Want an autograph?”

“No thank you.” Said Chief Bogo. “Do either of you have any idea of what happened to the hedgehog?” A few booths away, the Eds saw Chip and Dale.

“Look, Eddy!” Said Ed. “It’s Chip and Skip!”

“Chip and Dale, Ed.” Said Double D. “It seems that they arrived, Eddy. We should tell them about the car from last night.”

“Okay, Sockhead!” Said Eddy. “Full speed ahead, Ed!”

“Okey dokey, Smokey!” Said Ed, grabbing Double D and Eddy and charging through the crowd like a plow.

“This is highly irregular!” Said Chief Bogo. “Who are you three bozos?”

“We’re the Eds!” Said Eddy. “And we have valuable information to give to you! Take it away, Double D.”

“Last night at 9:01 PM,” Double D began. “A hand-drawn weasel arrived at FanCon and kidnapped a CG toon with a USB drive. He then drove into a vehicle that said ‘Angel Paradise’.”

“Angel Paradise?” Asked Chief Bogo. “I’ve heard of them. They’re a group dedicated to giving CGI Toons a well-deserved vacation, but whoever gets invited never comes back. And to add salt on the wound, all witnesses are memory-wiped! Luckily, it doesn’t happen to me, because cape buffalos never forget.” While Bogo was going on, Dale looked up Angel Paradise on Google.

“Here it is!” He said. “Angel Paradise! A complete list of all the Toons who’ve been kidnapped! Shrek, Po, Mickey, Donald, and Goofy, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Disney Princesses…” Chip then grabbed the phone to take a look.

“Dale, it’s not like they’d have their entire information on their…” He then took a look at the screen, and once again, Dale was right. “Website! It’s a list of all the kidnapped Toons, and who to kidnap next!” He then showed Dale’s phone to Chief Bogo.

“That’s too obvious.” Said Bogo. “This website is clearly a trap!”

“Actually, Dale can be right at times.” Said Chip. “He was right about Captain Putty working with Sweet Pete for years, even if it’s too obvious.”

“Can we take the case, Mr. Bogo?” Asked Dale. “I want to go on another adventure!” He then gave Bogo puppy-dog eyes.

“Alright.” Said the buffalo. “I’d hate to see something bad happen to my co-stars. They are going to star in a sequel, you know. You and Chip will have 120 hours to solve the case. Once you locate the missing CG Toons, contact the police station immediately!”

“Yahoo!” Said Dale. “That means we can reunite the Rescue Rangers again! Please, Chip?”

“I don’t know.” Said Chip. “You’re a CG Toon. That means you might get caught in a USB port and get… depixelated. I wouldn’t live with myself if anything bad happened to you.”

“The biggest risk is not taking any risks at all.” Said Dale.

“Alright.” Said Chip. “We’ll leave tomorrow morning. But first, we have to go to my house.”

“Hello, money!” Eddy said to himself while his pupils turned into dollar signs.

Author’s Notes: The name of the insurance company Chip worked at in Chip n Dale: Rescue Rangers was, in fact, called Coercive.

Bruno and Ribbits were two of Chip’s co-workers, both of whom were CGI and probably came from the late 90s/early 2000s.

Milo Murphy was the star of the short-lived Disney XD show Milo Murphy’s Law. From Phineas and Ferb creators Dan Povenmire and Jeff ‘Swampy’ Marsh, this show was about the misadventures of 13-year-old boy Milo Murphy, who seemed to have bad luck happen to him wherever he went, but was never aware of it.

The show never reached the popularity or success of Phineas and Ferb; As well as competing against more popular cartoons such as Steven Universe, The Loud House, We Bare Bears, and The Amazing World of Gumball, Milo Murphy’s Law aired on Disney XD, which Povenmire called Disney’s third stepchild. It was a channel dedicated to airing shows that were considered too edgy for Disney Channel, such as Gravity Falls. However, Disney XD was not included in most family packages, so Milo Murphy’s Law didn’t have as high ratings as Phineas and Ferb.

I was going to have Susan from Laika’s Missing Link appear as a co-worker at Coercive, but then I thought that there were too many stop-motion characters and not enough Muppets. As for what stop-motion Toons will appear later in the story, you’ll have to find out for yourself.

One of the movies showcased in the world of Chip n Dale: Rescue Rangers is a sixth Pirates of the Caribbean movie, Pirates of the Great Lakes. A poster can be seen at FanCon in the film.

Yes. Bob Iger admitted that a Zootopia 2 is in development. I just hope that it doesn’t recycle the same plot as the original.

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