A Loud Legend Chapter 5

It was soon dinnertime, and Rita couldn't help but notice the bruise on Lynnard's forehead.

"Honey, what happened to you?" She asked.

"Nothing, dear." Lynnard lied. "I was practicing with Luna, and she hit me on the head with an AirSoft dart."

"Lynnard," Rita whispered into her husband's ear. "I thought I told you to sell that thing."

"Wow, you have an AirSoft gun?" Asked Lana. "I should participate in the war instead of dad!"

"I'm actually the one who shot dad, so I think I should participate in the war." Said Luna. "The only down side is that I can't listen to or play my music. Besides, Lana, you're too young to fight in the war."

"This isn't right." Said Lincoln. "Neither of you should have to go. There are plenty of people out there willing to fight! Besides, Lori is the general's girlfriend and second-in-command!"

"I'd rather die trying than have one of my daughters or son get killed." Said Lynnard. "Besides, the only wars you can survive are your deluded video games like 'Halo' or 'Call of Duty'!"

"I may have done wrong things in the past," Said Lincoln. "Like flush your CDs down the toilet, embarrass my sisters globally, start a chore strike, and destroy mom's workbook, but if you just let me..."

"I know my place!" Shouted Lynnard. "It is time you learned yours." Upon hearing that, Lincoln left through the back door, despite it being a stormy night.

"It feels like he stormed out of here! Ha ha ha!" Joked Luan.

"I hope he feels better." Says Lana.
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Meanwhile, outside, Lincoln couldn't help but cry. He hid under a serpent statue to shield himself from the rain. With a pair of binoculars, Lincoln saw Rita patting Lynnard on his shoulder. He was getting ready for the war in the morning.

Lincoln couldn't let that happen, so he headed to the graveyard and lit a fire in the cemetery, which was guarded with umbrellas thanks to Lucy, and prayed to his ancestors.

Next, Lincoln left a sticky note on Lynnard's dresser and took the envelope that Squidward gave to him today. Lincoln also went to Luna and Luan’s room and took Luan’s flypaper, just in case.

Next, Lincoln took some of Leni's makeup and drew on a fake facial hair, since he didn't have facial hair yet. He also put covering on his acne so the other soldiers wouldn't notice, as well as a mouth guard perfectly disguised as teeth to hide his braces.

Finally, Lincoln took Lynnard's armor and put it on. This time, he put on the helmet, so his makeup wouldn't wash off. However, he also brought an umbrella just in case. Lincoln also took Grandpa Albert's sword, a family heirloom.

Since Lincoln didn't have a driver's permit yet, he went to Lynn's stable, and it frightened her. Lincoln calmed her down by patting her snout, and they soon headed off to DeLisle Isle.

Suddenly, Lana woke up and discovered something.

"Lincoln is gone!" This woke up everyone in the house. Lynnard noticed a sticky note on the dresser, and he got up and started reading it.

'Dear dad,

I've gone to the war to serve in your place. I wouldn't live with myself if you or one of my sisters got killed! They may be a pain, but I still love my sisters. Please wish me luck!

Sincerely, Lincoln Loud

PS. I also took Lynnda with me, since I can't drive yet.'

After he finished reading, Lynnard ran to Lynnda's stable in the backyard to find the horse, but there was nothing in there.

"You must go after him." Said Rita. "He could get killed."

"If I reveal him," Said Lynnard. "He will be." Lucy saw them from the window of the backside of the house, and she felt bad for what might happen to Lincoln.

"Ancestors, hear our prayer." She said, with tears coming out of her unseen eyes. "Please help our brother Lincoln."

Meanwhile, in Leni's room, Leni noticed something.

"Hey! Where's my makeup?" She asked. "Never mind, they're in Lincoln's room. What, where's Lincoln?!"

“Lincoln’s not the only thing missing.” Said Luan. “Someone took my flypaper! Now this is a sticky situation! Ha ha ha!”
Author's Notes: The incidents Lincoln explains are the episodes 'Making the Case' (embarrassing his sisters globally), 'Chore and Piece' (starting a chore strike), 'A Novel Idea' (destroying his mom's workbook), and 'Sleuth or Consequences' (flushing his dad's CDs down the toilet).
The name DeLisle Isle comes from Grey Griffen's maiden name DeLisle. Grey DeLisle Griffen is a very talented voice actress, ranking among June Foray, Tress MacNeille, and Nancy Cartwright. Some of the characters Grey voiced over the years include Vicky, Tootie, and Veronica Star in The Fairly OddParents, Mandy in The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, Frankie Foster in Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends, Azula, Prince Zuko's sister, in Avatar: The Last Airbender, and Lola, Lana, and Lily Loud in The Loud House. She's also the modern-day voice of Daphne Blake from Scooby-Doo.